Time is passing…. (from ‘Eveything based on nothing’ book by G. Gh.)

Strangely enough time is passing, even when it seems impossible, even when I can fell your last kiss on my lips, even when temporary lulls cover me. But it does, even for me…

I have not looked at your photo for so long time, that I am afraid I will forget your face soon. I am afraid to remember you, but I am also terrified to remember. It is a hard line for me to walk, but I have to. I can not stand this pain any longer. I try to read, I go to work, I laugh with my friends, but I can’t keep myself from thinking.

I am writing to you again hoping that somewhere in the other part of the world your heart will be beating wilder. Every word that I am typing now carries the warmth and love that I have inside of me for you. These love and warmth are so strong that they can cross thousand of miles that are between us now.

The love that we have behind us is still living in my heart. I want to leave everything, every memory, forget and forget forever. But still it is so difficult.

I will go on writing hoping that may be one day I will get answer to my letters. I will wait for your letters inside of my heart. But I know that I can’t retrieve our past together.

Today I was given a question: what is love about? As for me love is about the nights when we  were chatting, the Moon at which we were looking at to feel each other’s look. It is also about the walk in the autumn park and about warm winter day when we had our first kiss. Love is about my portrait which I still in my room: your present. It is the greatest of presents that I have ever received. There is story behind everything and there is a long and beautiful story behind my portrait. Every time when I look at it I remember the smile in your face the day, when you were coming towards me having it in your hand. You were wearing black glasses which suited you perfectly . I could hardly keep myself smiling and running towards you to hag you so tight and close. I was standing in the middle of the street in the very centre of traffic without even the slightest fear of being crashed by cars.  All the voices around was growing deaf second by second. And soon I did hear nothing. I was gazing at your smile which was like a leading star. Your character was always and is a leading star for me. Sound and senses came back to me when I heard your voice, ‘Hi, my love.’

Thought I have heard your voice millions of minutes before for the last time I will recognize it in the mass of human voices, I will recognize your smile in the mass of human smiles.

Still my heart belongs to you!!!!

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